Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
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