This is not my ceiling
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
Randomize
