Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
