We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
