I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Randomize
