It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Randomize
