Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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