I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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