I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
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