I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
