But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
