I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Randomize
