one might say we're banned from that church
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
