I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
