my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
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