How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Operation Purity has been aborted
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
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