I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Drunk is not a location!
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Randomize