Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize