SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Randomize
