I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Swine flu is the new snow day.
my being single is dangerous.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize
