Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
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