I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
