I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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