shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
My balls are so social today.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize