But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
