I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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