I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
i out mim tonsoeep
Randomize
