I'm laying in your front yard are you home
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
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