She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize