he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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