HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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