Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
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