just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
Operation Purity has been aborted
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
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