yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
Randomize
