There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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