I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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