We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
