You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Randomize