I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
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