he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
