i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
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