People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
