Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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