This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Randomize
