they said they heard you say put it in my butt
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
