i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize
