dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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