I could make wine with my vomit
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize
