do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
