Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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