Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
My ass is underappreciated
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
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